Why You Should Adopt a “Fake it Till You Make It” Attitude

Pros and Cons to "Fake it Till You Make It" | The Luxi Look in Minkpink Sweater, Forever 21 Skirt

We’ve all heard the phrase “fake it till you make it.” Truthfully, it always sounded like a bunch of BS. But when I started thinking about it and read more into it, I came to realize that it might actually be a key to success. Not buying it? Hear me out.

“Fake it till you make it” can be confused with lying, being manipulative, and overall being full of BS. On the one hand, it’s true that you don’t want to be someone you’re not, and you certainly don’t want to be deceitful. On the other hand, sometimes we all need a little boost of confidence that might come in the form of “faking it.”

woman wearing an all black outfit

woman leaning on a column and sharing the Pros and Cons of "Fake it Till You Make it"

woman wearing black sweater and skirt and sharing the Pros and Cons of "Fake it Till You Make it"

It turns out that there is some research out there that backs up the psychology of the “fake it till you make it” mindset. Here are my thoughts:

Why you should “fake it till you make it”

You’ll believe in yourself and be more confident.

The way I see it, it’s all about conveying confidence. I wasn’t comfortable calling myself a blogger for a long time. In fact, there are some days when I still don’t feel like I’ve truly earned the title. I work a full-time job and don’t even dedicate the majority of my day to my blog, so it can be tough to identify myself as a blogger, just a part-time blogger. But then I realized that other people won’t take you seriously unless you do, and if you can’t even believe in yourself, you can’t expect anyone else to. After all, what we think, we become.

It can help in social situations.

Socially, it also helps to “fake it till you make it” – especially for us introverts!! As a blogger, it can be hard attending events alone when you don’t know anyone. Over the years, I’ve learned that it’s ok to “fake” being an extrovert in these situations. At work, it can help to fake “it” (confidence) when you’re in meetings or giving a presentation.

You’ll be taken more seriously.

Ever heard the phrase, “dress for the job you want, not the job you have”? There may actually be some truth to that saying. You shouldn’t completely change the way you dress, but it doesn’t hurt to look put together at work or when you’re meeting someone new for the first time. First impressions matter, and oftentimes they last, so why wouldn’t you want to put your best foot forward?

woman in a black sweater and skirt

woman sharing Pros and Cons of "Fake it Till You Make it"

woman leaning on a glass outside a store

When you should NOT fake it

If you can’t ever be yourself.

If you’re constantly faking it, when are you presenting your true self to the world? Can you truly be honest with yourself?

If you can’t back it up.

As with all things in life, if you want to succeed, you have to be prepared. It doesn’t matter how much you “believe in yourself” or “fake it” – if you don’t do your homework and don’t have the skills to ultimately support your claims, it won’t do you any good.

At the end of the day, the goal is to become the person we are trying to be. There’s a great TED talk on this topic – specifically, the power of our body language in conveying our confidence. Social psychologist Amy Cuddy says: “Fake it till you become it. Do it enough until you actually become it and internalize.”

What are your thoughts on the fake it till you make it attitude?

xx, Amy

48 Discussion to this post

  1. I totally agree with you on all points. I think faking it to build up your confidence is a great way to get that boost you need. I too have a tough time calling myself a blogger and always shy away at events, but I think you almost have to develop a persona that you can use to give you the motivation to get out there and meet people. I love this all black look on you and those amazing boots. I always look forward to your meaningful posts Amy! xoxo, Christine
    http://dailykongfidence.com/

  2. So true babe!! I totally agree!! It is a good way to get further in live and staying true! Love your look by the way and your hair! Xx Susanne – http://bagatyou.com

  3. Stephanie says:

    Looking cute in black dear
    XOXO
    Also check
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  4. Miri says:

    Hi Amy, I will definitely check that TED talk. I am going to an important event in march and definitely have to look confident to sell myself! Have a great Wednesday.
    X
    Miri

    http://currentlywearing.com

  5. JarOfSweeets says:

    You look amazing! I love this style! Black, of course, will never steer you wrong!
    Well done with the good article!

    -JarOfSweeets-
    http://www.jarofsweeets.com/sweeets/grand-bazaar-collection
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTvr7Na0Mzw&t=3s

  6. Nora Gouma says:

    Wow, what an amazing outfit, amazing combo as well, all perfectly match, I love it. Thank you for sharing, you look fabulous!!!

    xxx

    http://www.bridesonamission.com

  7. Keri says:

    Absolutely love thus and you look soo good <3

    Enclothed Cognition

  8. Areli says:

    First of all this is such a good post, I really enjoyed reading it. I think its safe to “fake it” especially in social events, like you mentioned but obviously not all the time or we’ll just lose sight of who we are! BTW love this cute outfit!
    xx,
    Areli’s April
    Areli’s April on Bloglovin

  9. Jenn Wang says:

    Love this post and couldn’t agree more. Thanks for always creating great content for The Luxi Look fan girls like me. 😉

  10. emily says:

    I totally agree with you babe! It’s definitely necessary at times to adopt the ‘fake it’ attitude, especially when you are a blogger. I find it difficult attending events by myself, but try to ‘fake’ confidence to get out there and meet new people!
    x Emily
    http://shedoes.com.au

  11. Lisa Linh says:

    Great points made girl.

  12. Jalisa says:

    First off, you look absolutely gorgeous! I love this entire outfit and how you’ve added such interest and detail to your monochrome pairing. As for the fake it ’til you make it mindset, I do agree with you. There have been social instances where I’ve done this and it helped me get over insecurities. Thanks for sharing, beauty, and I hope you’re having a wonderful week so far!

    XO,

    Jalisa
    http://www.thestylecontour.com

  13. Vanessa says:

    This is such a great post! I totally agree, sometimes we need get out of our comfort zones and pretend that we are extroverts esp when you’re a blogger since we attend so many events! Great tips and u look stunning!
    xoxo, Vanessa
    http://www.WhatWouldVWear.com

  14. Sabina says:

    I totally agree with your thoughts on this. I too feel like it can help with your self-confidence, and especially in social situations (I am also an introvert!). I’ll try to apply it more often in such circumstances 🙂

    Sabina | I’ve Got Sunshine

  15. Jessi Malay says:

    Amazing post and outfit babe! I agree with every thing you’ve said… I definitely think the “fake it till you make it” attitude is such a great approach to life. Thanks so much for sharing babe! <3

    XO Jessi,
    http://www.mywhitet.com/vanity-fair-young-hollywood-party/

  16. Gabrielle says:

    Such an interesting topic and your thoughts on it were really interesting to read through. I agree that sometimes ‘faking it’ can be beneficial, especially when you’re trying to be taken seriously in a situation! Gorgeous outfit by the way, this skirt looks amazing on you!

    aglassofice.com
    x

  17. yuka says:

    looking amazing as always! you make even an all black look feel so interesting and fresh!

    http://www.prettyinleather.net

  18. Katherine says:

    This post is so true and I love your outfit!

    http://www.myclusterofthoughts.com/

  19. Tony says:

    I love your posts! I would rather appreciate if you could let me know if you could promote any of our products on your blogg!
    our website is: http://wayuupatterns.com
    looking forward to hear back from you again

  20. Didier says:

    The Chloe boots <3. The Gucci bag <3 You are looking amazing!

    I see what you mean about faking it till you make it. I think its more about projecting a different aspect of your persona. Just like Beyonce brings out Sasha Fierce when she's performing, Its all about projecting a persona that is confident and slight more over the top than our usual one, without being untrue to who we are.

    Fantastic post!

    -Didier
    http://www.didieryhc.com

    • Amy Zhang says:

      Yes!! The key is being the best version of ourselves, or who we want to be (but might not be there yet) – without being untrue to ourselves! Which can be tough! Love the Beyonce vs. Sasha Fierce comparison!! I might have to use that next time lol. Thank you for reading Didier! xx

  21. Rina says:

    A really interesting idea babe but I totally see where you’re coming from! Especially with the phrase ” dress for the job you want not the job you have”. Even if you aren’t feeling the most comfortable or confident in a given situation, if you appear like you will be a lot better off!

    xoxo
    Rina Samantha
    http://www.andshedressed.com

    • Amy Zhang says:

      Absolutely, Rina! I had a lot of friends share their stories with me of how they “dressed the part” for a job to appear a certain way, and it actually helped! Turns out looking put together led to their clients taking them more seriously. So that was major inspo for me to get my act together and spend a little more time getting ready in the morning! xx

  22. emma says:

    such a grat idea for a blog post- I completely agree 🙂

    http://www.londonstylegirl.com

  23. So stunning darling! This shoes are awesome! Im really in love with!
    xx
    Mónica Sors
    MES VOYAGES À PARIS
    NEW POST: CASUAL CHIC LOOK | JEANS, MAXI COAT AND VELVET
    DON’T MISS: CHLOE LOVE STORY

  24. Asterienne says:

    This is absolutely true.

    If you want to be a professional, you have to act professional.

    And if you want to act professional, you gotta look the part.

    Not just to convince your bosses but also to convince yourself.

    When I was a freelancer, I was perfectly confident to work from home wearing old sweatpants… but If I dressed up and worked elsewhere, in a cafe or a library, I was far more productive.

    For me fashion is also a way to boost self-confidence.

    • Amy Zhang says:

      Thank you for sharing your experience and insights babe! I totally agree – I have heard some many stories of people “faking it” by dressing more professionally and “looking” the part – and it leading to success! Fashion really is such an incredible way to boost our confidence. xx

  25. Pia says:

    I’m ALLLLL about this. While I don’t think it really sounds like the most inspirational moto, faking it til you make it is great because I find that one day, you wake up, and you’ve made it! And that’s a really cool feeling. A++ post

    xx, Pia
    http://gymbagsandjetlags.com

  26. Karen Or says:

    You are so gorgeous! Obsessed with that sweater I need it too 🙂

  27. Erica says:

    Great thoughts dear, and every point of it is true. Stay confident, but not fake 🙂 Thanks for the post x

    Erica
    http://www.eggcanvas.me

  28. Jenny says:

    As an introvert this post really speaks to my heart. For the longest time I kept my blog a secret because I also felt like I haven’t truly earned the title of being a “blogger”. But the older I got the more I realized the importance of believing in myself, because like you said, if I don’t believe it, how can I expect others to? I think the fake it until you make it is all about that, and having the confidence to pursue your dreams, while still remaining true to who you are inside. The last thing you want is to portray a fake persona, because the truth always comes out in the end 😉 Thank you for sharing this! <3

    Jenny // Geeky Posh

    • Amy Zhang says:

      Thank you for reading, Jenny! I’m so happy this resonated with you – the amount of response I got when I wrote the post was tremendous and it made me feel so much better knowing I wasn’t alone. Wishing you and your blog nothing but the best of luck xx

  29. Jamie says:

    Thank you Amy for sharing this post. If you don’t show that you are confident in yourself and your actions, why should anyone have confidence in you? It’s true to blogging or any job for that matter.

    Love the black on black outfit!

    http://jamieonthings.com/

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