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By Amy Zhang January 11, 2017 in Lifestyle, Wellness 74 Comments

Learning to Love Me Time

Does anyone else just love spending time by themselves? Go to restaurants and movies alone? Take long walks by themselves? Stay at home on weekends and not make any plans? (I know, I’m a total grandma). In my opinion, there’s nothing better than some “me” time. It took a while, but I finally learned how to be alone (and kind of love it).

Learning to Love Me Time

To be fair, I’m not alone all the time. I do live with my boyfriend and we spend a lot of our free time together. However, he travels a lot and is gone often. I’ve also been in almost 4 years of long distance relationships in the past. So I’m more than familiar with the feeling of being together but apart. It’s a strange feeling/totally sucks (a post for another day?).

Learning to Love Being Alone | The Luxi Look

Learning to Love Me Time

I’m a firm believer in learning to love being alone. I know this isn’t easy for everyone, especially for my more extroverted friends that love being around people 24/7. Me? I love some time alone to cook a good dinner for one, read a book, catch up on trashy TV, and write. It wasn’t always so fun and easy, though. For a long time, I hated being by myself. I hated being in a long distance relationship. I hated being apart and having to spend time alone. #needy?

But over the years, I have come to really appreciate and cherish those moments – especially because I’ve never lived on my own (unless you count living in a hotel half of the week during my consulting days?). I love my relationship, but I also love spending time by myself. It’s liberating to have a night or a week to myself and do whatever the hell I want to, whenever I want. As you know, I am all about self love. The best way practice this is to spend time by yourself! Go to a cafe or wine bar and read by yourself. Go out to meals alone. Take walks. Find new hobbies and learn a new skill. There are so many things to do alone and who knows, you might even learn something new about yourself.

Do you love being alone? Hate it?

xx, Amy

By Amy Zhang January 10, 2017 in Lifestyle 39 Comments

2017 Reading List

Confession: I do almost all of my reading on the internet. I get my news from the internet (trying to balance the sources I go to). I read a LOT of blogs – style (obviously), healthy living, beauty, decorating, politics, science. The list goes on and on. I scroll through my social media feeds, and fall for a lot of click bait on Facebook and Twitter. Sometimes it feels like too much, especially when you realize how much of news on the internet simply isn’t fact checked or verified. Or disappointing when I click on a post only to be left feeling unsatisfied and wanting more (hence the click bait). As entertaining as blogs and articles are, it’s just not the same as reading a good book.

2017 Reading List

I loved reading growing up. I had more free time obviously. But I would pick up a book and not put it down until I finished it. I still try to read as much as I can, but with a full-time job and a blog, sometimes actual books fall to the wayside. I read somewhere (on the internet, lol) that setting small goals is best, so I’m starting small. At least 20 pages a day. Which is HARD for me because once I start, I can’t stop. Unless I fall asleep. But I really do want to read every day. And not just stuff on the internet!! I have a kindle that is collecting dust. Although, TBH I really prefer actual books. Is anyone else like that?

Here’s what on my 2017 reading list for now – but I’m always looking for good recommendations!! So please leave them below if you have any : ). I’m making a point to read even more in 2017 – and staying accountable by posting updates on the blog. Who’s with me?

Follow me on Instagram for more updates.

xx, Amy

By Amy Zhang January 7, 2017 in Lifestyle, Style 78 Comments

Don’t Be a Perfectionist

I’ve been getting a lot of messages lately asking for blogging tips or advice. I’ll be doing a Q&A post soon (if you have any questions leave them below) but I wanted to quickly touch on the question I get most often, which is “what advice do you have for new bloggers?”

If I had to sum it up in one phrase:

Don’t be a perfectionist.

Seriously.

I alluded to it in this post. If you’re trying to start something new, Nike said it best.

Just do it.

Who cares if you make a mistake or it’s not perfect? You’re starting from scratch. The only thing worse than doing something to get started is doing nothing. Does that make sense?

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” So take your first step. If you’re trying to study for a test, you have to read the first page. If you want to lose weight, you have to go to the gym for the first time. And if you want to learn a new language, you have to learn that first word. We all start at square one and go from there.

I was really adamant about just starting my blog and learning how to put posts together on the go. Were my first posts amazing content that changed people’s lives? No, but it was a start. I had zero readers anyway (except my mom, LOVE YOU) and if I was going to fumble around and make spelling/grammatical errors and misformat my posts, that was the time to do it. I still make lots of mistakes. It happens. You learn and you grow. You move on. I could have spent months preparing my blog, choosing between three different blog themes, writing and re-writing posts until I was 100% satisfied. But then I wouldn’t have launched when I did. In fact, I might have never launched at all.

When you’re just starting out at anything, chances are you’re experimenting and learning.

You’re bound to make mistakes. But you’re going to get better. When I first started blogging, I didn’t know anything. Arguably I still don’t know anything, ha! I didn’t know how to set up a website, edit my photos, organize my Instagram, look at blog or social analytics. And I didn’t know what I wanted to write about, how to write a post, what it meant to “find my voice” or “create content.” Seriously. I was starting from ground zero. And unless you’re a social media maven or digital expert, you’ll be in a similar situation. But that’s what was so exciting to me about starting a blog.

I’m not saying you should be careless in your actions and do bad work. But being a perfectionist, while having its bonuses, can also leave you paralyzed in the face of action and overly self-critical. The point is you are always changing. You learn and you grow. I’m not perfect and I’m not always content with where I am (although I’m trying to be more present and happy with the now). Who cares if the blogging market is “saturated”? I’m on a journey to improve myself and my blog, to learn something new every day, and focus my energy on creating better content. It’s not realistic to look at someone who has been blogging for a long time and hope to start today and be where they are.

Not gonna happen.

You need to take your own time to find your own voice, figure out what sparks a fire inside of you, and how you want to express yourself. That’s the best part of having a blog, or any sort of “creative outlet” – you learn a lot about yourself and the story you want to tell. At the end of the day, isn’t that what matters? #cheesybuttrue

Thanks for following along with me on my journey.

xx, Amy

By Amy Zhang January 4, 2017 in Beauty 5 Comments

Hair Essentials

As you may already know, I colored my hair for the first time about a year ago. I didn’t realize how high maintenance coloring your hair is, not to manage the damage it does on your hair. Since then I’ve had to completely rethink my hair routine and find ways to keep it as healthy as possible. My mantra is always quick and simple, I can’t be bothered to spend hours doing my hair every day (not to mention the number excessive styling does to your hair) so I’ve assembled a little arsenal of products I use on the reg but still feels relatively low maintenance. These are the hair essentials products I’ve tried, definitely check them out if you haven’t.

Hair essentials I use everyday

1. Wet Brush

For a long time I didn’t brush my hair often. I like it a little beachy and dirty (lol). Unfortunately, my hair did not like that – especially when I would go a little too long in between cuts. Talk about a tangled mess. I really didn’t feel like paying out for a boar’s hair brush (I’m sure they’re amazing), so instead I got the Wet Brush. Under $10 on Amazon and it does the job. Tangles and knots are gone, even on wet hair (hence the name).

2. Oribe Dry Texturizing Spray

My holy grail hair product. I try not to use too much product in my hair (I like to go as long as possible in between washes and too much product weighs your hair down) but this is the only thing I use every time I style my hair. I run a curling wand through my hair (really randomly and quickly, the whole process takes less than 10 minutes) – happy to do a tutorial someday – and then spray this stuff all over. It smells amazing and gives your hair the perfect second day gritty/beachy texture you want if you’re into that stuff. A bottle lasts me a long time – if you’re going to buy one hair product this is it. So worth the price tag, I promise.

3. T3 Micro Featherweight

I usually air dry my hair, but if I’m going to blow dry it myself, I use this baby. It dries my mop insanely fast and leaves it so soft. Love.

4. Drybar Hold Me Hair Clips

I really have to thank The Skinny Confidential for this one. Her sleep bun tutorial changed my life, but more than anything I like wearing these around so I can put my hair up without creasing it with an elastic. I get a lot of comments and weird looks from people who think I’m wearing a chip clip in my hair but I don’t even care. Not a fan of blowouts, but these clips are just my favorite.

5. R+Co Pinstripe Detangling Spray

See #1 Wet Brush. This product helps with the brush when sometimes my hair is just too tangled. It happens. This spray helps. I’m super paranoid about my hair thinning, so this conditioning and detangling spray helps me avoid yanking out too much hair with my brush.

6. R+Co Palm Springs Masque

I use this masque before I shampoo once a week (if I remember). It smells so good, reminds me of my favorite weekend getaway spot, and helps treat and condition my colored strands. I know a lot of people go on and on about coconut oil but it just seems to weigh my hair down and doesn’t do anything for my texture, this stuff actually feels light and refreshing.

7. Oribe Gold Lust Oil

Oribe products are my fave, but they’re really pricey. This stuff is worth its weight in gold and therefore appropriately named, but if your hair reacts well to coconut oil that’s a good cheap alternative. Keeps my ends soft and like all Oribe products, smells like paradise.

8. Olaplex

My colorist swears by this stuff, you use it once a week before shampooing. I like to put it in the night before and let it soak in before rinsing it out, it helps strengthen and repair colored hair and I swear is the one thing that has kept my highlighted hair as close to its natural state as possible.

So there you have it – all the hair products I use regularly. Have you tried any of them? What are your go-to products and styling tips?

xx, Amy

Shop the best hair essentials

By Amy Zhang January 2, 2017 in Lifestyle, Style 6 Comments

Do What Makes You Happy

Happy 2017!! What are everyone’s New Year resolutions/goals for the year? I’ve been all too guilty of making resolutions in the past and forgetting about them after a couple weeks (let’s be honest, who hasn’t done that?). In the spirit of setting goals and being more intentional with my time and energy in 2017, I try to focus on broader themes for my life. I read this article before the holidays and it really resonated and has stuck since then. If you have a minute, I highly recommend reading for yourself, especially if you’re in a similar situation (hate going out, feel boring staying in).

Do What Makes You Happy

As someone who is definitely more of a homebody (my idea of the perfect NYE is at home on the couch – definitely someone in her mid-twenties going on her 50s…) and in a serious relationship (Netflix and chill is a literal lifestyle, plus some Postmates), I felt like Anxious Homebody was speaking my language. But what was said after went beyond going out/being social/remedying the stress that comes with feeling like you should go out but you don’t want to. What was said next summed up how I want to approach my life and live in the new year.

“Do exactly what you like to do and don’t pay attention to other people’s expectations of how you should live. I spent too long trying to please other people. Trying to counteract my natural impulses, trying to hide what I truly enjoyed and trying to enjoy things (and people!) I didn’t enjoy, and I was never served by that, for a second. I wound up making plans that didn’t excite me and building dissatisfying relationships with people who didn’t make sense to me.

…Make peace with who you are. The more you’re in touch with the things you love to do and in touch with the things you really, deeply dislike, the better off you’ll be. When you feel guilty and ashamed of what you want, all you do is fuck shit up. You bail at the last minute; you hide your true desires; and you treat friends badly. Instead, recognize the value of female friends and find ways to see them that don’t involve dancing and drinking until 3 a.m. Expressing yourself clearly, without guilt, and telling people what you want directly goes a long way.”

Moral of the story? Do what makes you happy.

Be honest with yourself and focus your time and energy on the things that matter, the things that you love doing and the people you love spending time with. Invest in those people and those activities. Stop wasting your time on the other stuff. You’ll be a better friend and human when you’re not making plans you don’t want to do and wishing you were doing other things. There’s no point in doing things you don’t want to do to please other people or putting more time in a toxic relationship.

Similar to Marie Kondo’s book on helping you de-clutter, evaluate the way you’re spending your time. Does it spark joy? If not, then it may be time to rethink that activity or relationship. This applies to more tactical resolutions as well. Looking to lose weight? Find an activity you enjoy doing instead of forcing yourself to do exercise you hate. You’ll be more likely to stick with it in the long run. Looking to make a career change? Take your time in finding the intersection of what you love to do and what you’re good at. We’re all going to be working for a long time, so you might as well not rush into something only to have to start over again.

Do what makes you happy.

Not exactly a resolution, but a mantra for my year. New year, new you. As cliche as it is, there’s no better time to make positive changes in your life. Let’s make this year the best one yet.

xx, Amy

dress: privacy please (on sale!) | jacket: moon river (on sale!) | hat: similar